Today is my last day of work before surgery. Am I getting anything done? Nope. Did I eat something bad for lunch? Yep. Have I stopped drinking soda like I'm supposed to? Nope. Will I before Thursday? Yep. Ok, enough of that crap.
I haven't been sleeping well because my anxiety has been getting the best of me and I'm having dreams of dying, having complications and not coming out of surgery with my band for some reason. All of these reasons are unwarranted and silly, but sometimes our minds run away and we are left standing in the dusty lane coughing and shaking our heads like, WTF?!
I took tomorrow and Thurs off so I can catch up on stuff at home like laundry and cleaning so my DH and Mom aren't overrun with chores while I am snoozing like a bear on the wonderful cushy blue recliner in my living room. They will be busy enough chasing around my rambuncious 3 year old, so go them!
We are due at the hospital at 7am Friday and surgery is at 9am. I'm supposed to wash my body with this nasty smelling sterilizing body wash and not put on any lotion or body spray, so I get to go in smelling like a hospital and being nauseated from fear at the same time. Good times.
Alright, I guess I should make even a small attempt to be productive at work today, even though my brain is already shut down for the day.
I can't help but keep thinking that a year from now how much different my life will be. We are taking measurements all over and some swimsuit pictures thursday night so I can record them (not on here for awhile, sorry) and see the progress, especially when I'm on a plateau and struggling.
TTFN!
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